Listening to this on repeat today. And then my daily reading has me brought to tears. (As does much of what I’m reading today. A message is supposed to get to me, I think.
It has me focused on the last three words.
What woman doesn’t want to hear this from the man she’s devoted to? I cling to the idea love like this exists. I’m a hopeless romantic and a sucker for true devotion.
Pitiful Girl.
Adding the entire reading, as it might be helpful to another.
Shakespeare wrote of the future-
“an undiscovered country”. I see,
bounding together
new rituals and
their meaning, which
will anchor along
a journey,
where souls squeal
in delight, and life
no longer vacant, thrives.
Sat at work today thinking on yesterday morning’s worship and it had me giggling all over again.
Being Mommy today
I feel my soul opening
Flying free
A day full of smells and
Happy.
there’s a shift recognized
goes unseen by most
a voice goes from commanding
to the whisper of a ghost.
rejection so subtle
goes unseen by most
a presence longed for
hidden now, door closed.
i could get lost inside you,
graciously forever, often
yearning for the
direction
you show,
beauty
you create,
protection
you offer,
mystery
you provide,
colors
you inspire,
dreams
you conduct.
without them, i
wouldn’t know where to begin
and incredibly certain
i wouldn’t want to.
This afternoon I drove for awhile, after work, before turning around and heading home. You see, it’s not a far drive from one to the other and I needed to think, so off I traveled.
I watch the doves dip and weave
Chasing one another,
Yet I grieve
For a life I’ve dreamt about
Since I was a child,
In a grey, aging, house
There were giggles
And four children the cause,
Despite their loss
Of the everyday normalcy
Of Mom being near,
Nothing making sense, life unclear
If love exists, breathes, you say
Will it fulfill my wish,
Not run – at the top of my list
So sovereign Cardinals in my view
Standing watch, yearning
Might keep me from melancholy.
With so much love inside of me
Love to give,
Share
Offer
With a blank stare returned,
I’m unsure if its power exists
Within me. Maybe
I’ve fallen hard
For a disguise, and
My head, heart and body just incapable of understanding love.
when we realize
devotion is what they really need,
and it becomes our true focus,
we climb towards accepting reality.
being blessed
to witness their peace,
or to become their daily and intricate detail,
is our gift.
understanding, finally, we’re not a guarantee in what
is meant to be, but it’s okay to hope.
He does this thing
Where he’s patient with me,
Yet
Calls me on all my junk
And then waits,
That’s when I want to kiss him the most.
The last few weeks have had me considering the idea of closing my site down.
Wondering if maybe its time to move on and away from poetry.
Don’t bother comparing us,
Simply won’t do,
We share similar parts,
But totally different hues.
Sensing your internal struggle,
Trying to decide between two,
Confessing to you now,
She’s finding her way back to you.
Knowing your confidence all too well,
I’ll offer, what I know to be true,
I prefer to continue alone,
If she still owns any part of you.
I fall hard
but this is what I do.
I imagine long walks,
you pointing out the vision
I see as reality,
but this is what I do.
I picture myself as a flower,
each petal adored, even
in her simplicity,
but this is what I do.
The vast Midwestern skyline
of Nebraska takes me to
where you are daily, and I pray
but this is what I do.
I wander inside of a daydream
where we exist as one,
but this is what I do.
There
Isn’t
Anything
To
Wait
For.
This is it, and so is now
And now,
Now
Now
Now
Now,
Yep, and now.
You get the idea.
I can remember when becoming a mom consumed my every thought.
How to convience, plan and encourge a journey leading life in that direction.
Those first few months, I recognized within me a confidence, it was solid, made for it, indeed. Doubt didn’t stand a chance.
I never, not once, saw myself going it alone.
Being mom always included a dad.
Here I am, a mom. Content with how we’ve done. The children are a constant beside me. Never questioning the road. Still not comfortable parenting solo.
I always thought families deserved both.
Even if mom looks like this…
I think you’ll agree there’s an astonishing similarity.
Circa 2012
There will come a day,
When I can look upon,
Their relationship,
And say, in my experience.
Until then, I will continue,
To watch in awe,
As they deem one another,
Poetically united: a lifeline.
if anything, I see
beauty returns eventually,
subtle drops of rain
worth clinging to fall down, eventually.
robins bounce about
puddles found,
my eyes search cloud ripples
finding your name,
and summertime is born
maybe that’s all there is to say.
I get caught up in the lyrics
a poet, most surely always has.
He listens to the music
proud of his favorite band.
I lean in closer,
following his lead
he listens for the horns,
I pray the words are for me.
Oldest Daughter & Red Headed Sister 