Leaning Into Real

maybe writing this out will help me compartmentalize my thoughts
there are so many distractions as of late

The new year came in with swords drawn and a battle ensued
one I’m currently within

I’ve been rude to those around me when it was never my intention

maybe inside a daydream isn’t where I should reside, only making life worse

tangible moments, proof they exist, is where my heart currently lives

Faith begins and ends my day, serving makes sense inside my head
an inability to understand is fine, just accept me for who I am

all praise honor and glory be, yes to the Father,
and then it’s he.

He who is out there, slowly keeping pace
would begin and end my moments, but that’s only what I need.

no desire left to chase, fearful of ending back in a place where questioning motive and truth controls my each and every day.

does peace exist? are relationships worth creating…

me who’s father was gone too much, a mother who left all together
how do I believe this isn’t the pattern,
it’s happened, one after the other.

leaning into the belief, if love is meant to be

easing into a life alone, tending to sheep and children who are all too soon grown, where will I go?

Listening for the answers I know my God has planned, I pray I don’t mess this up
looking down at my empty hands.

knowing each and every piece given to me for care,
is one I’m made for and a joy to prepare.


21 thoughts on “Leaning Into Real

  1. “Cue: Some moment designated: LOVE
    Containing its own built-in distress
    Statutory though … So no blame then
    And with also some kind of kindness
    Inserted just to be on the safe side
    As Spring springs to life past Winter
    Hmmm … Seems time to learn to listen to learn from Nature”

    – from “Cue” by Ben Naga.


  2. Wishing you peace and love, friend. It is one of the super powers we have as writers that we are able to open up our hearts, lay the contents on the table(screen) in front of us and examine things. You will work through the jumble and find an order, I am sure of it.


  3. Many profound thoughts and questions…. I think we all face them at some point, but to sensitive poets, we feel them more crucially. Relaxing into mindfulness seems to help at times – and produce answers. πŸ’•


  4. This one on the surface seems understandable, but methinks it’s way deeper than that. You’ve posed a lot of questions here which I can’t answer. All I can do is try to encourage you to remain faithful, and He who sustains us will be faithful to provide exactly what you need, when you need it.


  5. I’m not sure what to say here, you’ve asked so many questions of yourself, and only you know the answers. All I know is that love is grand, I’ve loved, cared for her, and stayed by side until she died. There was pain and hurt, but they’re the emotions that burn inside, the same as love fires in our soul, it’s all part of the life we live, really, it’s the same this Easter’s story, there’s no love gained without experiencing pain. πŸ˜“


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