Compassion
Stillness delivered
Upon colorless strengths
Extort your view
One side: a true reflection
I am neither
Show me how to be both
Tag Archives: Women
Sisterhood
Sisterhood,
Together we are one.
I cannot deny your essence,
Nor could I ever measure beside,
But, just so we become verily clear,
Your existence now surrounding him:
Champion of versed rooted strength,
Provides my journey’s refinement.
I am you
You am I
Leaning into the remedy of his skin,
My eyes upon your desire to be close,
I witness your valuable life flourishing,
Becoming tolerant of your nearness,
Understanding why we’re both here,
I begin to care for you, as well.
Your presence nourishes me,
He, is pleased.
Marked Liquescent
Business
Thrive
Incessant Desire
I don’t need a happy ending
A knight in shining armor
Isn’t what I seek
I live in daily humor
I don’t need you to rescue me
What I crave incessantly
I mean, what I’m asking,
Quite honestly,
Is for you to force me to feel
Submit to my sensitivity
With vigor found inside you
Write until your heart bleeds
Then, fall into me
Her Path Of Scars (Haibun)
Across her vulnerable path there are old scars. Disfigurements, some bigger than others, yet similar in color. A few are the remains of the same tragedy, now multiplying and adding to those festering lies she whispers to herself daily. Tracks you’ll find as you begin to travel over her essence. The lies she encourages herself to believe guide her day. These defining untruths continue to slide through her thoughts in an effort to ruin her spirit, until you find a way inside her mind.
Life begins to grow, as you navigate within her arduous attempts at disbelief. A primal power you possess as her guide in this fight. Verdant leaves found full of color and sprinkled throughout her path react to your light, then grow and allow for clarity and healing to finally begin. The solution she never saw as her possibility now renews her strength. This an event you can take pride in, as it is you who has fed her daily. She, now your light, is devoted. Finally, once again, she believes in truth, love and authenticity.
The scars are still there, as you run yourself across her core, however they don’t define her anymore. Each tragic event has been honored. She trusts your hands, loves you, and with all that she is, needs you to be yourself completely. Importantly, she is a body of scars, but they have healed with the help of your interest and devotion. Your love, that lives inside of her now, is a blessing.
Beauty of nature
Submission Empowerment
Rooted in belief
Multiple Beauties
My Early Morning Hike Of Inappropriate Thoughts
While walking down a trail one early morning in Nebraska, I stumbled upon this mushroom.
I was shocked at first, I won’t lie. Interesting, right? Look at him, y’all! I began giggling like a 13 year old girl. I confess, Mother Nature had me going x-rated during an early Saturday morning hike around the lake.
Beauty Of The Garden
Beauty of the garden
Soft, smooth and velvety
Perfect shade to please
In season and willing
For you to take a peek
Approach her gently
Don’t confuse her
With your favorites
She’s no lady in waiting
She’s completely aware
Of what she offers
Not your normal flavor
Command her attention
Ease into her with caution
She shines iridescent inside
Wrap Me
Wrap me tight
I need to feel you
Whisper that I’m okay
To be lost this way
I know you’ve been here
This same place
Maybe different thoughts
Yet, always same place
Confused
Lost
Full of pressure
Yet, not alone
But all alone
You know?
Smiles on the outside
Tears allowed
Only for me
I could be
A different breed
Women need
Women seek
Advice, daily
Not me
I couldn’t possibly
Show weakness?
Not in front of you
Do What You Do
Just perform for me
Yeah, okay, pull the stocking cap down
Run your hand through your beard
Whatever it takes, prepare
Pretend I’m not here
Just sing the lyrics
Remind me
Show me how to feel
Prove you already know
Take the wheel
Just do what you do
Feelings already sorted, better than I
Direct the deep notes, in my favor
Allow me to bleed
Waiting for your music to soothe me
Just play the tune
Let me fall into you
Silence? No, it’ll kill me tonight
Slide your fingers over the strings
Quickly, even slower, bring me through
Just make me believe
This music will ease
Regret, pain and suffering
I should have never even tried
Kill me, like the beat, softly
Writing Process Blog Tour: How I Write
I was asked to be part of this week’s Writing Process Blog Tour by Sharon Bonin-Pratt. Under a simple description of being “Sparked by Words” she takes us through her writing process. Shari’s blog is everything sparked by words could possibly mean. She nominated Jacqui, Ilene and myself to share our writing process this week. I learned a lot by reading Shari’s post. Please, give yourself some time and read her blog. She truly has something to share.
When Shari asked me to participate, I simply lowered my eyes, nodded in agreement and said, “Yes, Ma’am.” I knew Shari and I would be friends early on. Shortly after reading that she and her husband live in a eucalyptus forest in Southern California, I thought, “There is such a place? Too cool.” Shari, one of my very first followers, has sat beside me through my first year of blogging as a true supporter. She is a friend, I thank her for believing in me, and for trusting that I have valuable experience worth sharing within our community.
Now, for the record, y’all, we’re about to read more words in one post than I’ve written in six months on Oldest Daughter & Red Headed Sister. I hope you make it to the bottom. Anything more than a hundred words is pushing it for my faithful crew, as I’ve trained them to believe that I am now a reflective poet. One who doesn’t have a need for this much explanation, but truth be told, I’ve loved writing this post. It’s been a nice break from 3,000 words a night for my book.
Part of this blog tour is nominating three bloggers to write a post on their own writing process. All three women accepted my nomination which delighted me, because I didn’t want to have to go begging door to door or blog to blog. I have enough desperation pouring out through my poetry. Look for individual posts by these three fantastic ladies on Monday, April 28. I chose these three women, because they have shown such amazing support, but also because they work hard to show their personal investment to their own writing journey. I can easily get behind that sort of determination. I respect their goals and encourage them to keep moving forward.
Heather B. Costa
My name is Heather B. Costa and I am an aspiring writer who one day hopes to have her own book published. I only began writing seriously just over 12 months ago and it has gone from being a hobby to a way of life.
I devote as much time as I can to learning my craft and developing my skills and I am now taking my first serious steps towards achieving my goals and becoming a published author in my own right.
Kate Loveton – Odyssey of a Novice Writer
Aspiring novelist. Avid reader of fiction. Reviewer of books.
By day, my undercover identity is that of meek, mild-mannered legal assistant, Kate Loveton, working in the confines of a stuffy corporate law office; by night, however, I’m a super hero: Kate Loveton, Aspiring Novelist and Spinner of Tales.
My favorite words are ‘Once upon a time… ‘
Won’t you join me on my journey as I attempt to turn a hobby into something more?
Stacilys – A God Coloured Girl in a Grey World
I’m just a simple girl that is passionate about being relevant and making a difference in this world.
World traveler, lover of bright sunny days, experiencing cultures, good friends and conversation. I love my God and love my family.
I don’t believe that I have the Truth, but that I have a relationship with Truth and want to be closer to Him.
Canadian, born and raised in Vancouver, BC. YWAMer since 2000 and have traveled and lived all over the world –Hong Kong, China, India, Bangladesh, Nepal, Afghanistan, Turkey, Germany, Argentina, Australia and The USA.
I moved to Brazil in 2002, married an awesome “Baiano”, Daniel, and we have two adorable kiddies, Caue and Hannah.
I am certified in fitness and nutrition and conducted physical conditioning classes while working with an arts and evangelism team and schools. I am also certified in TESOL (Teaching English to Speakers of Other Languages) and TEYL (Teaching English to Young Learners).
“A God Coloured Girl in a Grey World” is my blog where I write articles based on my faith, post fitness routines, recipes and other health and wellness stuff. You can also check out a bit of my music at http://www.myspace.com/stacilys
Okay, we’re half way done. Defeated yet? I can now answer the four questions that come along with the writing tour. I’m pretty wordy, so let’s just get to it.
Four Blogging Tour Questions:
1. What am I working on at the moment?
I’m currently working on poetry, but more than that I’m working on being Audrey Dawn, the writer. Does that make sense? Are we okay with that being part of my writing process? Imagine spending years trying to be the person everyone thought you were, because it made them so happy. I put on a brave face every day and made everyone happy, happy, happy. I smiled, I laughed, I helped, I counseled, I encouraged, but I never cried, showed fear, admitted failure or said no. I’m currently working on doing everything I’ve never allowed myself to do publicly. Well, almost everything, gesh.
Releasing the control I put on myself has opened me up. It has created the poet I’ve always wanted to show. I was afraid of the emotion writing publicly would allow. The thought of people finding me too weak or sensitive has become less and less of a fear. My writing poetry, and allowing it to be read, has helped me work on myself. I have a few very loyal blogging friends who continue to push me to submit my poetry online. I am also writing a book, which I am extremely proud of at the moment. I’ve stayed quiet about my book writing. My inexperience in the writing world coupled with my lack of professional writing credentials created a fear of inferiority years ago. I can honestly say now that the voice is not winning. I feels fantastic.
I went to college to earn a degree in English, which was coupled with a creative writing emphasis, and topped off with a social science minor. What do you suppose I do with that? Live in a cardboard box reciting my poetry. I’m a few steps ahead of that actually, so I’m living the dream. Yeah, so that means I can write people well. I’ve studied them a long time. Have I allowed the writings out of my hands in order to succeed as a published author? No. This is the toxic voice in my head doing its best to discourage me. My followers have done a great job of overturning that voice this year. I am forever grateful for every word of criticism and encouragement I’ve received. My plans to prosper within the writing community has gained momentum.
The poetry I write is therapeutic. I have forgiven, loved, hated, longed, prospered, achieved, yearned and dreamed through healthy emotions, which I have had inside my soul all along. Very few I shared with anyone, because as a controller of myself, I chose to safe guard my heart from ever being let down. Sharing what I’m working on is a process I am currently battling, and winning. I think it shows through my poetry, as we all felt that fantastic love, then the desperation, and currently the recklessness of my protagonist, Amelia. I’ll be sharing my book with you soon. I can’t wait to tell you all about it.
2. Why do I write what I do?
Here I sit writing from a public library in Galveston, TX, after a rough night out on the town with friends. A quick bit of down time for me, as they do a little finishing up. Last night, a group of us ended the evening at a drag show. Yes, it was fantastically entertaining and an eye-opening experience. I was with one of my dearest friends and a few of her closest friends from college. One, of which, is trying to survive cancer. Her diagnosis is why they were all together this past weekend, and the reason they’ve been getting together every year since she was diagnosed. I began my evening humbled for being allowed inside their tight network. I watched how their communication flowed with ease. I am fully aware that it is the devotion to their friendship that has created their life long bond.
Watching them interact helped me to reflect on why I chose to start my blog, but more so, why I have switched gears and began sharing poetry. Experience, emotion and truth are what any solid friendship or relationship is built on. Correct? These are the universals to which we connect ourselves to others, I think. Consider it. The beauty of this is that we don’t even know the friendship has approached longevity, until relationship has arrived in full bloom, and we’re miles down the road of emotional investment. Then one day, we happen upon a cherished memory that proves our devotion to one another and seals our mutual bond. I write my feelings, because everything I’ve seen and read has in some way impacted my thoughts, emotions and my own life. I want to share my writing with a community of people who are investing in the writing process and in themselves .
3. How does it differ from others in the genre?
I am a performer, and I thrive on attention and feedback, but when I’m not in a crowd, I reflect a lot. I can go hours not chatting with anyone. Lost in a world of reading, writing, or visualizing its what I do. Currently, my blog differs from others of the same genre, because I am also teaching myself to be a better communicator. Truly, the only way my blog differs from others of this genre is by the timing of my emotions. One day you may identify with me wholeheartedly and feel a connection that could last a lifetime. The next day, you could hate my guts, so at best our relationship has a survival rating of about 50/50. Are you willing to take those odds? I totally am.
4. How does my writing process work?
My writing process has always been the same few steps. Yes, I’m a creature of habit. I have a very short attention span, probably an undiagnosed ADD and dyslexic issue from childhood. As an adult, I’ve adapted very well. I attribute that to my ability to speed read. There is no other way when you’re working with a short attention span, in my opinion. Music helps me focus on my task, so headphones are a must when I need to keep from becoming distracted. There’s also something to the light pressure I feel from having them on my ears. Headphones tend to center me. Yes, it could be a gravity issue, I hadn’t thought of it. I have found myself in a writing fever only to notice that I’ve had nothing playing through my headphones for hours. Yes, this really happens.
Before I get to that euphoric writing place, I visualize by staring off into white walls, usually as I’m doing this I haven’t written anything down. What I do find myself producing is pages of doodlings. Letters, numbers, pictures, shadings of light and dark images are all found decorating my pages before my writing begins. I’ve often considered posting my doodles along with my poetry or stories just to see if anyone could enlighten me on my perfected madness. Yes, I’m completely comfortable admitting that this process of mine can’t possibly be normal. Tell me if it is, please. After about thirty minutes of warm up, my mind calms and everything I’ve held inside for the day pushes itself out.
I know, phew, that was rough. What I have found, in all seriousness, is that if I do not sit down to write everyday I become ridden with anxiety over how quickly I can clear my schedule so I can write. This is an awesome feeling inside of a dramatic setting, because I want to write and share my thoughts with you. I’ve never wanted to freely share my writing or what my mind is thinking. Not without feeling like an attraction at the zoo, anyway. My friends, this is something I would have never thought possible a year ago. My writing process is alive and well.
Anger
I grew up taking care
soothing pains
of those who suffered.
Who taught me?
Two sisters, brother,
mother and a father.
~
Oldest Daughter
fights for all.
Redheaded sister
hugs when they fall.
~
Don’t tell me
I’m vain,
Superficial;
or bloody insane.
~
The poetry
I write
is of happiness,
often healing me
at the end
of my day.
~
I tend to
women’s tears,
when there’s no
money for simplicities.
~
I feed children
with no lunches,
after mothers
have forgotten.
~
I fix worn out clothes,
even when I don’t know how.
~
Trust me, these people
I know;
live in my heart.
~
I’m not
what your
eyes see,
my poetry,
an escape for me.
~
I write of love
hoping to create it
for all those who
are denied.
~
Yes, I admit, it helps me too.
~
Am I confident?
~
Yes, I cannot help
this part of me.
~
Take it or leave it.
~
Maybe, just let me be me.
~
I know suffering
I feel it everyday
humanity is
my sibling,
my child,
my sister,
my friend,
my brother,
and my end.
~
I will go to my grave
trying to save them all.
I’m allowing you
to catch me when I fall.
Look me in the eye
when you’re looking
for a fight.
~
This girl will react.
~
I just might…
My Morning
Woke up
My fingers trailing
Softest of spots
Too early for a lullaby
A surprise in my dream
I heard you singing
My favorite song
To the beat of my breathing
In and out goes breath
A woman’s body
Ample place to fall
Finger tips like feathers
Upon my fair skin
Submitting
Blushing
This pleases you
Wishing
Your Lady
She chooses who she’ll be
Powerful
Meek
A conformer
Unique
A woman is born to dream
A soft skinned girl on her terms
Rough and edgy when she’s protecting
She’ll make you laugh
You’re on top of the world
When she brings you to your knees
Reflections are seen
Her power lives, there’s no denying
She loves you hard
She feels safe
On top of the world
A life you’ll create
Stand beside you, fists drawn
Planted in front, protecting your cause
Even behind you, for her faith
One she believes twas God to create
Behind doors she’s all yours
Treat her like royalty
You’ll forever be her King
Shoot her your infectious smile
She’ll give you anything, heart’s desire
Shy eyes sparkling
Or run to you craving
Agreeing to fulfill your need
Consuming
Just Don’t Ask Me How I Am
Can I offer the holding of my hand?
Just don’t ask me how I am
I’ll let you kiss my lips.
Just don’t ask me how I am
You can touch me from here to there.
Just don’t ask me how I am
Is it sex you want?
Just don’t ask me how I am
I’ll scream your name during our love-making.
Just don’t ask me how I am
Call me when you’re lonely, I’m okay with that, too.
Just don’t ask me how I am
(See, I told you. 😀 ) Less talk. More action. That’s who this woman is in all walks of life. A woman who isn’t great at communicating. ..an enigma, of sorts, I guess you could say.
The Past
When did I agree to take on all this responsibility
Are long gone the days of careless attempts at skinny dips at the lake
Music cranked so loud I feel my body shake
I see that part of me now, only a few times a week
When I’m sitting in the car waiting for children to over take
I look into the rearview mirror and see Aud The Bod staring back at me
Long red curls, loads of dimples too, chasing boys, but only a few
After twenty years what still rings true
I’m a storymaker, romantic and dreamer, just like you
Emotional Creatures
Tears
In a woman, show her heart.
Anger
In a woman, reveals her truths.
Sadness
In a woman, is real.
Smiles
In a woman, define her peace.
Laughter
In a woman, proves her happiness.
Silence
In a woman, might as well mean death.










