My Early Morning Hike Of Inappropriate Thoughts

While walking down a trail one early morning in Nebraska, I stumbled upon this mushroom.


Do you see what I see?

I was shocked at first, I won’t lie. Interesting,  right? Look at him, y’all! I began giggling like a 13 year old girl. I confess, Mother Nature had me going x-rated during an early Saturday morning hike around the lake.

Yes, this mushroom reminded me of a genital member. However, I thought maybe I could, eventually, write a poem about him. Him being a small mushroom house for a sweet fairy. I see now that this poem will Never. Ever. Happen. Without me laughing, and I take myself far too seriously for that… *wink*

I took the angled curve in the path and it was like an phallic army had set up camp. Look at them all! Can you see them? I’ll have you know that I laughed a lot more like a grown woman this time. Most grown women cringe and know better than to imagine that many…mushrooms.


Phallic Mushroom Army

I, on the other hand, laughed authentically and could imagine nothing else. How strange a mushroom army, wouldn’t you say?


Just incase you needed reminding

Then I saw this mushroom, my friends. Much more strange looking than the many mushrooms found above, and a bit scarier looking, I think.


Creepy fingers, maybe?

Yeah, that’s when it occured to me that these weren’t phallic mushroom cadets crowding my path. This was the slow rising of the creepiest creatures I could imagine! Zombies? Aliens?

Long alien like fingers coming up and out of the ground after the, from the looks of it, long or well endowed male parts, had me worried. Left me wondering what or who they were coming for…

Yes, this is where I stop, because once again I cannot behave.

In the end, I began running fast because I’m a scardy cat…

Do you see what I see? Am I being far too childish about my observations?  Would you have laughed with me? This may have been an alien sighting, right?


44 thoughts on “My Early Morning Hike Of Inappropriate Thoughts

  1. Yes, Aud, it was a field of thingies. Kind of Allman Brothers Band like in its mushroom sense, in addition to its membership card, think. Quite the discovery, in any case. I’m not so much for the zombie thing, though.


  2. I would’ve laughed right along with you! It’s not childish at all, but an appropriate reaction to all those phallic mushrooms. Which are more funny than mushrooms looking like alien fingers (going into the realm of the creepy). Since you giggled over these mushrooms, what have you done when faced with a field of tulips? Talk about a phallic army marching onward…


    • Nav!! I found you in my spam folder! How’d you end up there? Anyway, your comment cracks me up. Strange looking Smurf, I’d say. *pre-teen giggles all over again* Weird…so weird. It was like out of a dream or something, I think. LOL I’ve never seen such a mushroom, or….well, mushroom. πŸ˜‰


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