What Is Everything

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Treasures from my heart
The gems no one else gets to see
The ideas that complete me
Gives you the lock to my key
My feelings

A need for someone
To push me too far
To make me feel anger
Allow me the act
Teach me to throw
Multiple plates through the air
Create an opportunity
Make me bow to weakness
I want to lean on somone
Catch me once, please
For my love
Paint me a picture
Of my tears
Show me they’re beautiful
Worth sitting near
Each and every freckle
How you hold it dear
Force me to look at myself
In a mirror

This simply
What I want
Force these feelings out
No one ever has
Well, just once
She’s bat shit crazy
Just look at her eyes
Made up
No long lost love
Back in India
A story created poetically
I just wanted closer to you
Honestly
Something to fight about
To make me feel alive
It was what I needed
My heart’s open
Not a scorned woman
Just one begging to feel

What people don’t see
When they look at me
Is all my vulnerability
Years of controlling
Any feeling
In hopes that another
Wasn’t victim to stealing
Yet happiness the latest casualty
See what I do to me

Tell Him Everything

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Stop
Be quiet
Do you see him
Over there
I wish you could
Reaffirm he was my sleeper
Please
Relieve my fear
Proof that he existed
My only concern
When you find him
Tell him everything

He is
Tall
Mighty
Strong
Every breath of his
A word of beauty
Trust me
You’ll want a piece
A piece of whatever
He’s serving
Try to catch him
But when you do
Remember
Tell him everything

When he’s with me
I am complete desire
Back then
Twas all new for me
Thrilling
Yet, I haven’t seen him
Not in a while
When I wanted
All I had to do
Was wave my feather
His hands would come
Willing and ready
Dominant
Masterful
Teacher
Helping me
Create poetry
My advice, my friend
Tell him everything

He’d love you
Smart
Pretty
Lifelike
Confident beacon of light
You’d love him
Calm
Cool
Collected
A beautiful distraction
Exciting news
He may be searching for you
Look around quick
Spy his wit
Let him in
Tell him everything

Take the ride I denied
Please him
Let loose of your control
Give him your eyes
Undoubtedly
Tell him everything
Just do it slow
Enjoy the ride
Allow conversation to flow
Words of love and devotion
Pleased him ever so
Made me afraid
And now it’s too late
Gone
For me
No chance
Of telling him everything

He’s gone on searching
For his one true love
You must go find him
Whoever you are
He’s waiting
Just one thing
For me
A promise, please
It’ll stop my aching
Tell him
Give him
Allow him
Everything

Camera Lens

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Camera lens
You’ve brought me in
What is it you want me to do
Walk with you and point out pretties
Cry with you over fatalities
Show you the flowers I dip myself in
I’m not sure, but can you smell them
Stare at clouds while you click click click
Hold you close while taking risk after risk
Learn your functions
How you work
Take my time
Pair your photos with my rhymes
Let you take my picture
Or maybe you prefer I walk away

Devotee

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In vivid dreams
I run to you
You run to me
Last night
There was no talking
At first I was sad
Heartbroken
Our time
Is it over
Tears began to flow
You held me
Reminded me
Devotedly
Sweet Darling
We love our silence
Communication
Between hearts
Share a common beat
Believe
I woke up relieved
I love you
You love me
What we have
Will always be
Bright colors
I see them
Accross a wide sky
At dawn
In fields
Flowers bloom
Like you, beautiful
Laughter alive
Shared between friends
Stop worrying
Start Creating
Begin living
Make a path
A voice inside
Screaming
Don’t give up
I think it may be you
You’re all around me
Devotee

Just Don’t Ask Me How I Am

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Can I offer the holding of my hand?
Just don’t ask me how I am
I’ll let you kiss my lips.
Just don’t ask me how I am
You can touch me from here to there.
Just don’t ask me how I am
Is it sex you want?
Just don’t ask me how I am
I’ll scream your name during our love-making.
Just don’t ask me how I am
Call me when you’re lonely, I’m okay with that, too.
Just don’t ask me how I am

(See, I told you. 😀 ) Less talk. More action. That’s who this woman is in all walks of life. A woman who isn’t great at communicating. ..an enigma, of sorts, I guess you could say.

Lost Without You

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Spirit flying near me
My muse
What are you asking of me
Courage
Believability
Authenticity
A face I cannot see
Has created
Stunning poetry
Spirit
I sense you
Pushing to leave
Even flee
Tell me
Give me
The words
I need
To make you
Stay
I can beg
Don’t leave me
Effortlessly
Promising
I’ll be good
My need
Nothing
Pitiful
Really
Craving to be near

Heart’s Anticipation

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Hearts break
Created for more
Than keeping us alive
The powerful organ
Innocently sitting
Beating
Yet, actually
Guarding
Anticipating
Each arrival
Life’s disappointments

Possible dream shattering
Inevitable realizations
Of real human behavior
Infidelity
Dishonesty
Silence
Alive
Breathing
Sending the final punch

Had the heart been waiting
Sensing struggles all along
Disaster coming
Forcing
Protection
Sending out low voices
Always
A mind choosing to ignore

Does the heart forsee
The size of the breaking
Afterwards
Is it even a possibility
It will heal
Provide the ultimate
Forgiveness
Questioning
Why it should
Stay a prisoner
For good

Only You To Say

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I haven’t the words
I’ve beg them to come
Rush over me
With true abandon
Nights full of craving
Days full of behaving
I plea
There is no describing
What your kiss does to me
Body alive
I come to you complete
Take me
Somewhere far away
Life less confusing
My heartbeat needs to flee
I can taste your need
It fulfills this queen
I can’t take much more
The decision making all yours
Will I survive the day
My love
Tis only you to say
Preparing already
Digging my own grave

Crimson Queen

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Dark footsteps sounding
A calmness overtakes
You’re coming
Release me
I’m begging
Allow her to breathe
Your power
Devours
I’m ready
Take all of me
Instantly
Invite her senses
Welcome her inside
I’m ready
By agreeing
Your world will change
Stay impressionable
It would behoove you
Yet, I’m ready
My name on your lips
Princess of Darkness
How little you truly know
My dear, my love
I see my throne
Make room
I’m ready
I will
Command your lips
You will
Identify my new name
The Crimson Queen
In all her beauty
Alive
Living
Ready

A World With You

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Robin Red Breast tweets
Do you remember
Our melody
Water, crystal blue
Consuming
Allows me to dream of you
Children’s laughter
Creates my giggling
Yes, the way you prefer me
I find myself singing
Music accompanying
A stunning beat
When you’re around me
I crave sharing
Food’s most tempting flavors
Nights full of wishes
Desires
Your arms owning
Providing, peaceful sleeps

Darkside

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As soon as I’d written my angel’s conversation with God. My hand wrote this:

Don’t let go
Hold on
Stuff it
All inside

You look crazy
Dumb one
Yes, you, woman

Audrey, listen
You are alone
Still

Stay where it feels safe
Minding your own
Feel my control?

Just so we’re clear I don’t believe this to be true. Allowing myself to post this has given me the upper hand with darkness.

Yesterday’s Today

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Yesterday
I saw you
Walking
You, beautiful
Handsome, really
Shoulders out
Eyes sparkling
Responding
To God’s green
Everything beautiful
Yet, not me

Your abilities
Creative
Endless
Capturing life’s impossibilities
Proving their existence
A beautiful world
Never faltering

Yet, inside today
You scream
Towards me
Forcing me to believe
Darkness lives
Cruelty
Exsists
Accusing me unworthy
Of your eye’s view
I could have saved you
Yesterday’s Today, denying

Gone

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Thoughts of you return
There isn’t much I can do
Learning to write without you
Praying it isn’t true

Like a feather
My fingers touch
Words have meaning
Lost and grieving

Producing creativity together
Light as a feather
Fragile, too
Say it isn’t true

Does it bother thee
When I think of you
It must
My kiss, it went refused

Sunrise

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Sunlight pushing
Through my window
Oh how I’ve missed you
You beg me outside
Come play for awhile
Me always submitting
The warmth you provide
When I step into you
Welcomed
The light you create
Reaches far and wide
Brightness over takes
This woman’s mind
Your soothing rays
Meant to wash over my day
Reminding me
I’m alive
Always
Your rainbow of color
Feels like a smile
Strong and inviting
Helps me run towards you
Maybe one more mile
A sunrise you’ve perfected
Your job done
Rise up and come to me
Finding your place
Amongst the sky
Steady your pace
Join me today
Walking slowly
Enjoying our journey

On Sad Days

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The tears I cry
Contain your name
I miss you
No denying
In an effort to feel
I wipe my tears
You ignite me
Proving sickness
Lurking
Questioning
Why we’re alone
Magnifying
Worlds apart
Universe
You sicken me
You sense
My need
I witness
Creativity
All around
Yet offering
No, allowing
Darkness
Denying me
His smile
His mind
Alone
Searching comfort
In sweet bottled
Bottomless
Consequence
Understanding
Provides
An awakening
Creating hope
One day
Our beginning