Sunset’s Manifest

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Monochrome sets the scene
sneak away for a peek out West of town.
Creation mellows at about sunset,
and the prairie soothes a concerning brow.
Technology, news,  just one more issue,
back then, we’ll agree, was priceless compared to now.

Tailgate down, jump up  – have a seat
snuggle in close, let’s dream.
No snow to speak of is cause for concern,
forgo the complaints, smile, then breathe in deep.
There’s water in the Platte, plenty of
hay stacked up, and dry boots still warming our feet.

Giggles cause chuckles
and life begins to make sense.
A porch about here would work out nice,
a tire swing for the grandkids with no need for a fence.
Leaning into twilight , she’ll manifest –

Waving goodbye to choas – and life a little less tense.

Sense of Direction

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The summer rain has painted fields of sunflowers
and the August breeze cools the brow.
67 degrees in the Sandhills, and nobody can explain how.

Wheat with a sense of adventure has been brushed in for effect,
and life gets interesting
just beyond the hills,
as I hear, “You haven’t been over there yet.”

Push past the state line, skys bluer than azure await,
there’s small horse towns ’bout every 8 miles,
and remember, “When you leave, shut the gate.”

Fuel isn’t getting any cheaper, and time waits for no one,
so dismiss all the reasons why one shouldn’t,
smell the damp dirt, allow it to slide through your fingers, let the wind send it.

Press the pedal on the right, bite your lip, and
appreciate the sound of your giggle,
the prairie weaves over and under –
everything beyond here matters,
and you’re not getting any younger.

Loss

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when the call comes
time stands down
knees buckle
wind escapes the very breath I needed to speak.
a cry from within –
within me – it shocks,
shocks the very core of my being, a result
everyone warned me of feeling deep inside,
but then regret:
the regret of putting off
everything I should have said when it still mattered.
the searching begins
the desire for proof –
proof we existed together in this world
making the memories we shared valid,
meaningful and somehow important.
but then the awareness arrives,
becoming fully aware
eyes wide open,
there is nothing here to prove our connection;
my love.
lacking tangible evidence of a bond created out of a deep need to feel a part of something I lacked,
is the torture I, until today, didn’t realize I would be living with now forever.

Attachment

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hardened by what he’d seen; by life,
the reflection behind his eyes created a flutter within me

like a bee for honey, I was willing to work and eager.

I remained close.

Structured and protective, with experience as his guide, I longed for his reverence.

his strength I devoured silently but wanted to wrap myself in for all to see.

like many, I wasn’t chosen.

life is a mystery and voices often confused, so I remained hopeful – just in case.

yet the determination in his heart is wide, and he has much to attend to

and so it goes.

An Entire World Awaits

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what is time without a watchful eye,
til color fades, we mustn’t
gray tones allow hope
say it is so, dear one.
how is it my hands feel the road and its bumps,
while tires roll atop –
proof we’ve been here before
and what a journey it was.
clouds become pillows,
for murmurs under the sheets,
and the rain in the distance
a melody I remember and
cherish, please believe.
today is full of beauty, I smirk
yet again.
passionate in the ordinary I shall remain,
and glimpses of tomorrows
shall nudge me forward,
across the plains.

Passion

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The author wrote as if she had met the one I crave, finding him perfectly secure, genuine and honest before her.

She noticed the same details as I, and it shatters me to realize someone sees in him what I do and she may have the chance at a forever.

Which means I’m expendable, just one in hundreds of options.

Ha! Not that I ever stood a chance, I knew the minute we met he’d never settle for less than perfection.

He wouldn’t need to, because he was capable on his own and I added nothing he craved.

The Beholder

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Driving the farthest eastern reaches of the Sandhills as this scene beckoned. Was it the water, sunset or hills calling names? The topography, a sensuous mastermind, plays within thoughts while memories flood the present.

How dare it.

Just as beauty sets in, and atop the already gorgeous scene, to share this – would have been the only cherished wish left to whisper. A hand held. Hard kiss, even tug of the hair and a reminding of the natural, even recommended design for an alliance.

Useless comes to mind, but doesn’t it always? Untrustworthy. Less than. Nothing deemed attractive found near not even near, by not just one, but from many.

Wicked is fate as she tosses over another just out of reach, if only the physical qualities found irresistible and encouraged were obtainable by another’s remnants. Would life continue to offer beauty with hopes someone might see?

Sprucing Up The Place

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deteriorating wall
color combinations weak
periscope, maybe

***

A few housecleaning details for y’all today. I am aware it is Friday, and nobody likes cleaning on the edge of a weekend, but I needed to say thanks for all the recent follows. AND thank you for not giving up on my poetry.

The giggles are returning which is always a good sign. I’ve been writing a lot, but mostly I’ve been working. A lot. Like, a lot a lot. This past year has been incredibly busy with churches closed for many.

When the inevitable occurred it made my day job 100% harder.

I have become quite familiar with bells, whistles, bright lights, more technology, post offices, zoom, louder microphones and standing on my head. I’ve never been accused of having a case of “the look at me’s” so you can imagine what having to do so did for my soul.

My creativity took a beating as did all my relationships.

I’ll be sprucing up the place and working on updating my pages, as I focus on getting things ready for an announcement many have waited years to hear.

Find beauty in your weekend my loves,

Aud

Surrendered

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an ache within
for progress;
strengthening,
surrender something beautiful
surrender something sure.

a simple decree
less distress; a little more
happily ever after,
surrender something beautiful
surrender something sure.

apricot visions
release me;
wandering free the verdict –
but far from home,
surrender something beautiful
surrender something sure.