– C.S. Louis
– C.S. Louis
I’ve found myself in a state of reflection, yet again. Yes. I know. Do I ever move forward? We’ll see.
He’s my muse,
Maybe he’s forgotten,
Unable to feel
How I’ve wrapped them
So many times,
Within my mind.
He’s the attraction
The lust upon my tongue,
Yet I cannot reach him.
Aching with want
Living amongst the borderline,
Of am I enough.
I yearn for his trust,
As he longs for my mind,
If I give it away –
He’s mine – my wish,
Like a daisy chain around
My neck; a gift.
I’d wear him with pride,
If he’d ask.
I’m in love with being in love.
There’s nothing I have visioned for myself that excites me more.
I hear laughter
Eye squints as their sparkle escapes
I feel that upon my face.
Dimples no longer hidden within
The true marking of contentment
And its offer of grace.
The best of friends welcoming
Challenges – happy endings -frustrations.
Holding hands, connecting spirits
Building a firm foundation.
Take me there, widen the span of
Love’s true existence
Birth the eve of beginnings
And wrap me in the arms of the one
Who needs me.
Whispers in the depth of night
Whites of our eyes shining bright
Lips in movement
Words offer our reality
Conversing in shallow tunes
Touch, leaning into the heat of you
Expressing thoughts; gift to thee
Without fear, fate leads the he and she of our bonding.
it is his love i seek
his attention for which
my sun, all the stars
in my make believe,
are shining again,
i’m suddenly awake,
and know just who i need.
When did my confidence go to battle with my insecurities?
Why are they winning?
I know better.
I am better.
I will continue to thrive.
Go. It’s been done before,
I would again.
Throwing a temper tantrum would never work.
Waiting patiently gets me nowhere.
Being my quiet self is far too dull.
All that is left is to use my voice, yet, the quiver I hear isn’t very convincing as I try.
Fearing judgment may keep me from the happiness I know I deserve.
Wanting to be a playground, but instead I’ve become too common.
Take what is yours, these words I hear constantly in my head, I used to believe they were meant for me to say to the one who truly wanted me.
Maybe it’s what I’m supposed to do.
Huh, it goes against who I believe I am, but being left alone is too.