The author wrote as if she had met the one I crave, finding him perfectly secure, genuine and honest before her.

She noticed the same details as I, and it shatters me to realize someone sees in him what I do and she may have the chance at a forever.

Which means I’m expendable, just one in hundreds of options.

Ha! Not that I ever stood a chance, I knew the minute we met he’d never settle for less than perfection.

He wouldn’t need to, because he was capable on his own and I added nothing he craved.

Turning Point – May Show Vulnerability & Immaturity In Writer

“The scariest moment is always just before you start.” – Stephen King

I had to hand write an entire chapter the other day. Yes, an entire chapter, that’s what I said. It took me about seven hours and I have to say my hand cramped, a lot.

Tons. I am out of practice.

At one point, I had to physically straighten my finger due to it being stuck in a hook-like position. Then I had to hold my knee down, as it was shaking uncontrollably,┬ábecause of the reaction to the discomfort I was feeling throughout my arm. I wrote the chapter out, because I had decided to work through the pain of my thoughts by creating pain somewhere else; or because our monitor suddenly went black and I didn’t know how to fix it so I took the pen to paper.

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