Somewhere Beyond Serene

if the water could have sung,
I’d have heard it calling me,
drawn to its movement,
slow and consistent, I felt seen.
Instead of the arc of a rainbow in view,
colors swirled around twilight
as if they knew circles were
my favorite, and curves the most fun.
Nature’s beauty  spoke in only whispers,
requiring my heart to listen.
Rumi, INSPIRE – the ancients would plea,
but a woman like me,
lost between hope and regret,
will watch for you as the boats drift. Listening.
Waiting on timing, once again,
knowing somewhere beyond serene, you exist and I’m ready.

Aurora

Inside me lives a little girl:
giggly,
impatient and giddy,
over new.
New experiences, lit brilliantly across northern trails.
She, wide eyed, and with extreme expression,
has wished on every star,
counting them, 1, 2, 3,
will he find me?
Her neck exposed, eyes full of wonder,
up, up, and away.
The sky breaks, she no longer feels alone
color washes over her face,
darkness fades,
as night mirrors grace,
and light begins to dance.
Life comes alive, and her squeal echoes,
through the woods.
Look! Fingers pointing with urgency,
I see what she sees, and tears fall –
yet, fully aware of her inner whisper,
“Come with me…”
I sense my obligations.
Haunting.

Breathe

“Grass looks good.”
even when the state of the other side
of the yard is on his mind,
his kindness shines through.
“Maple trees aren’t worth the work.”
and another hundred helicopters
fall down, as the wind shifts,
he ignores that, too.
Focused on the positives, as another day
slowly drifts away,
I listen to the birds calling each other
back to the nest.
“Don’t forget to fill their feeder.”
is whispered, and I smile.
Chair feels comfortable for now,
three sit quietly vacant,
as the neighbors drive by.
Settled, the evening breeze soothes me,
I hear, “Good enough,”
and before I’m ready
dogs bark a good evening to one another.
a subtle goodbye felt within,
auburn hair brushes my cheek,
like vapor, his voice will leave,
as today sets behind the trees.

Unexpected


Her decision to be,
Welcoming and welcomed.
Taking chances, she survived, yet, now
She must let go of difficult dreams.
Made to sustain more than many,
Considered selfless and it’s been humbling.
Listening for the One true voice,
Matters most, and  stiffening whispers of I told you so, is tough.
He was right.
Her future is full of unknowns,
Who does she become here?
To thrive would mean taking a risk,
Opportunities will be missed.
Overlooked
Causing confusion,
Nothing worse than blindly choosing
Or second guessing
What she will be next.

Sending much love,

Aud

Oracle


They’re drawn to her inner sanctuary
a place not many have seen,
like rivers feed the ocean,
they travel miles, even upstream.

Large numbers greet her encouragingly,
sensing beauty when she sings,
yet, sitting closer teaches
her quiet and hidden screams.

Many refuse to listen,
carrying burdens of their own,
her voice a weighed reminder, many
bereft of home.

Her light – illuminated
she’s beautiful, protective, and serene,
fear not the angel greeting, she
seeks to comfort those in need.

Summer Fruits

Early summer grounds keeping…
We’ll bale hay another day,
there’s fish biting, and the sky’s blue,
I hear a voice inside me say.
Grass is still short over here, let’s sit and tell each other stories.
A cardinal calls from over yonder
seems simple, but they bring me to you.
Verdant pops over azure brilliantly as I lay down to stretch my back.
Wind will catch a branch, rhythmic in its timing, and life’s hectic pace slows, my breath less demanding.
Nourishment calms a craving, yet this fruit is barely listening.
And nothing, no, nothing is ever just perfect.
Who would want to exist that way…

Gravity

Goodnight, Day

as simple as it seems,

nothing could have prepared us,

we’ve heard and we’ve seen,

how life gives, and we take for granted,

our daily routine.

The world appears different now and gravity settles in,

weighty, and morning merely hours ago, 

city lights slowly turning on,

soon our capital’s night will show,

function becoming imperative, however,

’tis custom for nature to start the glow.

– Learning –  

a collection of photos and poems.

Philosophy

With a path laid out before us, chosen,

and for us to decide, we wrestle.

Life tugs us left and then right.

Experience breeds new thoughts; opportunities abound.

We touch, and its impact changes us.

What is is as hard as concrete, yet many believe in its fluidity. Leaving many to question reality.

Challenging our spirit.

Does life call us, or do we call upon life?

The beauty, I believe, settles upon how well we listen.

-Learning-

a collection of photos and poems.

Appealingly Nonsensical

Watching snow fall, not blow, but spill beautifully as if paid to do so by Hollywood, I find myself smiling. We could have prayed for years and never received this gorgeous day. Hours of complete enjoyment were ahead. We needed the moisture, and I knew we were finally seeing it, so contentment overwhelmed my heart.
I recalled a conversation about precisely how many feet of snow it would take for an inch of rainfall – yet I can’t for the life of me remember what the amount was, and so I giggle. Typical Audrey. I used to have people around to remember those details.  I try not to allow any negative thoughts when I can’t recall useful data because this, some would see as irresponsible, is me. I’ll chalk it up to not necessary enough and move on with smirk across my lips.

I find pleasure scooping snow while snowflakes fall one after another, some bigger than others. Not a breeze to be found, curious how we don’t normally refer to the wind as a breeze in the wintertime, but somehow yesterday the lack of came to me as such, while I threw another scoop of white to my left. Life appearing so peaceful and possibly perfect.

While others wait to forge a path outside, I find serenity scampering about doing small things, all the while listening for nature to wake. Silly squirrel presses forward slowly and leaps for a nearby tree. I consider how useful a new bird feeder would have been this morning and silently scold myself for not making that a priority in September and all the months that followed. It appears I was successful in punishing myself, although I had no idea I would be doing so at the time. Kept from the enjoyment I find in watching for cardinals, but made a note to get a new one next time I was in town. We shall see.

I ponder the quiet outdoors and how well I can hear myself breathe. My mind is open to possibilities, and how easy life can is if we stop and just do what comes naturally. Maybe you find it nonsensical, but a winter storm energizes me. All my daily musts are replaced by the here and now – and I do so love living in the moment as there is less time to ponder the what ifs. My muscles are tender, yet my mind clear.

* Just some thoughts & a silly little picture of the before and after of yesterday’s snowfall. I adore how safe the green bush appears after the snow. One powerfully protected by the other, it seems. Love that.

Always, Love

Sometimes people don’t realize what they’ve been offered, is room to grow,

space to breathe, heal, try something new, make decisions, and even complete final drafts.

Care: It isn’t always a verb. ‘Tis also a noun. The provision towards what is necessary; to apply consideration to a situation to avoid further damage or risk.

The beauty in love – space to grow – is in the offer to step aside in hopes of growth succeeding. Knowing full well everything may change, and we no longer matter.

Trust is felt, and when it isn’t given in return, we sense the void – feel the lack of – quite like someone’s arms length we clung to for years knowing we shouldn’t.

Love is the color of amber, to me, quite like every color squeezing in together, without erasing one for another in hopes of a happy ending.

Just Right

I watched the sun set tonight. She is such a beauty sliding behind the cedars.
Favorite game – hide and seek.
Her curve seems to hug “just right”around the tips, and well, I guess I’ve always thought so…
A small smile turned up around my cheeks, a flushing of pink appeared,
and then I thanked her for rising this morning.
As if to wink, she paused and then moved on, as one should, I suppose.

Healing

Our compassion comes from a place of empathy,
or at least it should.
Who are we if we don’t wish the very best for someone?
Trials greet us when we’re not  looking, sinking us  into new depths.
Gratitude overwhelms the healing pieces of us, and it is there we should bow.
Humbled.
Nature nurtures, realize this at the very least, smile and allow the comfort as it exhales its release.

Evident

Early morning viewing, only the good die young, or so Billy says.
Caught once again between regret and dread.
I thought of you this morning, driving into OZ,
“Turn around, Aud.”
I didn’t, nearly cost me my life, and here I am
pleading with the essence of what’s left of you.
Lead me, hollar louder,
my constant plea is evident, ignored.
I sensed your protection, view from afar, then kids told me, but – yet
you are who you are.

Govern

the source:
reason for one’s distraction

out here beyond the familiar, I escape.
ponder what it must be like
to go and wander,
past where bridges lie, and
to a place my feet welcome;
a path unrecognizable to my soul.
my mind allowed freedom
as I see myself pushing back against a warm summer breeze.
nightfall is yet to be seen, yet the week is already before me.
stillness becomes evident, while the sky slowly burns across Midwestern hues.
I sense maybe you’re listening, so
I offer this plea –
challenge me, but don’t leave.

The Climb

despite what looms around her,

the past
the expectations
the privilege
the power
the beauty
the silence
she chooses to try.


she begins at the bottom,
alone – yet, her
confidence is exposed as petals stretch.
amethyst her signature,
and starlet her pose,
the climbing inevitable, but
she’s worth it,
and you know.

Yours, Audrey