When did my confidence go to battle with my insecurities?
Why are they winning?
I know better.
I am better.
I will continue to thrive.
Go. It’s been done before,
I would again.
Throwing a temper tantrum would never work.
Waiting patiently gets me nowhere.
Being my quiet self is far too dull.
All that is left is to use my voice, yet, the quiver I hear isn’t very convincing as I try.
Fearing judgment may keep me from the happiness I know I deserve.
Wanting to be a playground, but instead I’ve become too common.
Take what is yours, these words I hear constantly in my head, I used to believe they were meant for me to say to the one who truly wanted me.
Maybe it’s what I’m supposed to do.
Huh, it goes against who I believe I am, but being left alone is too.
Silence this mouth
With words forgiving
Shut my eyes
Positive images abound me
Steady these long legs
Upon fertile ground
Wrap my eager hands
Binding them in grace
Within attentive ears
Might music absolve; save me
Amidst the clutter
Of my mind
I recognize who and what I love.
Clinging to primitive, and desire,
Into wooded respite
As I normally do.
A conscious decision every day, yet
Eventually every tree will fall.
How do I listen for one more?
i imagine the comfort
like warmth snuggled in
under layers of protection
surrenderer me with victorious him
daylight taken with pleasure
my body with so much to give
leaves the master of my affection
a playground he accepts as his
a muse so confident
doubt unable to live –
stifled and erased, becomes
a union of dominion and submissive
Bundled ‘tween you
There’s no place I’d rather be
Pink glowing sanguine
Adorned, in verdant elegance
Care extended with his selection
Her spirit encouraged to thrive,
Wrapped in accessorized protection
Red, his jewel of choice