Every word behind my chest,
Desires freedom,
Tonight.
Alas, once again,
I’ve censored who I am,
And forced reality to stop,
Immediately.
Leaving the ache placed,
Upon my breasts,
An endless continuation.
Suppression hurts,
Terribly,
Ceasing the pain,
Simple.
Yet, I refuse,
Leaving myself,
Paralyzed.
Sometimes my poetry is too revealing, so I fade before you, entirely too bashful to continue. Instead, I leave you this poem. I apologize.
Oldest Daughter & Red Headed Sister 
You see what’s happening, don’t you, Audrey? When you don’t post for a while, I seek past entries and am glad to find some I’ve missed (though sorry I somehow missed them the first time.) This is a mournful poem, about loss, pain, and denial. I hope you are not in this place again.
Remember, the path goes two ways, and one of them is forward to new opportunities. Wishing you only the very best, dear friend.
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I see a woman supporting another by holding her hand and encouraging her to write her heart, as people are listening. Thank you for reading my words and for checking on me when I’m gone too long. Yes, this is a poem about wanting more than anything to be transparent. To allow the woman inside out. Paying no mind to who’s watching…I’ve cleared my path and hopeful for new blessings. Indeed. Thank you for caring, Shari. ♡
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This is my LIKE button – I just clicked it.
So glad to know you’re doing OK.
S *: )
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No apology necessary, Audrey.
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Hi, Michael J. Thank you for stopping and saying hi. I saw your post this morning about your blog moving, but then when I clicked on it, it was gone. I feared I wouldn’t know where you were or your inspiring messages would be. I am relieved to be allowed to follow you now through this blog. I sat contemplating when I began following you and it was about this time of year or shortly before. I thought of the bubble bee haiku, the hike and the spider web musings and smiled. Your thoughts and poetry will always be near and dear to my heart. Your poetic peace brings me peace.
The best to you in 2015, my friend. Always. ♡
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Sorry Audrey. I posted it on my self-hosted blog and for once it automatically copied to my Word Press blog. But I also decided on a complete revamp. So I should probably put the link back. You can find me at grandpasway.wordpress.com.
I’m glad you feel that my words help. I think, though, that it works both ways. We inspire each other. So it’s good to know each other and I’m looking forward to more mutual inspiration this year.
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I was able to follow you through your grampa’s way blog. I look forward to more inspiration, as well. 🙂 I’m thankful that something I have to say inspires you, Michael.
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Thank you Audrey. It’s nice to have some fellow travellers sometimes. 🙂
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You’re welcome, Michael.
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You’re up awfully early, BTW.
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Not yet 🙂
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Sleep typing then, I suppose. 🙂
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Not that early. We’re on winter time so it’s now almost 8.00 am. Maybe it’s you who’s up late 🙂
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I was, you’re correct. 🙂
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Another pieces that reveals just a bit more of Audrey Dawn ~ another mysterious post, as with branches in the photos, leaves us wondering what is behind… Suppression can be good thing, as one day the day will arrive to set it free, and that is always a nice feeling, isn’t it? Cheers 🙂
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Randall, a whole world is behind those branches… *sigh* Yes, and she’s closer to allowing that freedom. Best to you this year, my friend.
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🙂 And to you too…
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♡
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Audith, just lay it all on the table, I say. And beat those who hate it. *nods like a brute*
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Yes, I believe you’re correct, Duketh. I shall try. *hands you the baseball bat* Stand over there, please.
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Nice! *awaits the pitch*
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*looks around for a ball* Umm, that was for hitting people with, you know.
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Ach, there ya go agin… dinna apologize, Audrey. ‘Tis a beautiful poem. I know that feeling, but have never heard it described so eloquently.
Blessings for the new year! May it be an exceedingly splendoriffic one for you.
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You, my dear, shouldn’t take such specific notes. Yes, once again, I have apologized, but maybe more to myself. Thanks for thinking so, Luke.
Blessings to you, as well. I hope you have a lovely date for tonight. Plans at the very least. Relax and enjoy the festivities of celebrating a whole new year ahead. I hope it’ll be amazing for both of us.
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Ah yes… I have a whole notebook full of notes I take on bloggers. It’s like Facebook stalking, but with less of a stigma. XD
Thanks! New Year’s Eve is always nice; spending it with the grandparents has become our tradition. 🙂 I hope so too! Excelsior!
Sorry I’m responding to all of these in the wrong order… I got behind. How in the world do you keep up?
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Hahaha. Such a polite fellow, You. *offers to sharpen your pencil*
Fun!!; I’d do that too, you know. If I lived closer to my grandparents. Glad you enjoyed!
No apologies necessary. ..tis tricky some days. No need to respond back…just have fun. No worries. No pressure. Got it?
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XD *finds a No. 2 pencil* I usually use mechanical ones though…
I got it. 🙂 You remind me of a friend of mine. Always assured me there was no pressure when I took forever getting back to her.
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*offers you a mechanical pencil in every color*
She sounds kind and sweet.
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🙂
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Apologize? About what? Way to be real and transparent, my friend. Awesome poem.
Hope you have fun tonight. Any plans?
Happy new year.
🙂 ❤
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For not allowing myself to be more transparent, I guess. Of not wanting to get into the conversations that will follow, as well. I’m getting closer, Staci. Thanks for being patient. xxx Thank you!
Yes, well a redhead always has something planned for New Years, right? 😉 Enjoy your night…and that handsome Hubby of yours. ♡
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Hahaha. We had somewhat of a boring night actually.
Red heads always have fun eh.
Thanks Audrey.
🙂
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I think everyone has a boring night on New Years. To some degree anyway. It isn’t ever much of an interest to me.
This red head tries, eh. 😉
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It is huge here. Everbody wears white. We just stayed in.
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You are beautiful in total complexity, Aud.
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Naw. I’m just really good at making it appear so, Chum. Blessings for the happiest new year, my dear.
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My thoughts exactly! ‘Tis hard to put oneself out there when one feels so very vulnerable, but if one is going to write, laying it all out on the table is better than suppressing. And one never knows how many others might feel the same way (but aren’t brave enough to express it — and need to!!)
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It can be brutally hard, Debbie. One day at a time is the only way to approach it, I think. Some days progress is made in strides and for those days I am truly thankful. Yes, agreed, we should all be better about expressing ourselves. A great challenge for the new year. Enjoy your night!!
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Something tells me it’s harder to be brave when it’s poetry you’re writing! Perhaps that’s why I write fiction, ha?!!
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Haha. Yes, because my poetry is my life revealed, but it is why I choose to write it. I need to release who I am. Some days it is just harder than others…more truthful, I suppose. I enjoy fiction, too. 🙂
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Have you been reading my mind? 🙂
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Oh! Good! This poem was meant for you. Thank goodness….
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Laughing. Maybe it was.
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So you’re gonna take this poem off my shoulders then, Susan? 😉 Thanks… Best of 2015 is on the way for you, I know it!)
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Thank you, Audrey. May your year be filled with wonder and joy.
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Thank you!
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There’s really no need to apologize to us. You choose what words and emotions you share with us. The heart is a complicated and vulnerable thing, and you should share what you feel comfortable in sharing. As readers, we should respect that.
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Thanks, Gus. I often must apologize to myself, as well. Nothing beautiful, amazing or positive ever comes from hindering or choosing to say no. To tempt fate, one must always say yes. A very wise man once explained that to me. Yesterday, I chose to disagree. No progress made. Thanks for sitting beside me on this one, my friend.
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There have been many times that I said no, and so fate was not tempted. I think living in a balance is good. That’s kept me from doing lots of dumb stuff that I probably would’ve regretted 🙂
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Yes, very wise words there, Gus. Unanswered prayers are ones to be thankful for, indeed. 🙂
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well said – beautiful!
Welcome New Year…
We look forward to you
A year of wonderful happiness
A year of good health
A year of great success
A year of incredibly good luck
A year of continuous fun
A year of world peace
Happy New Year 2015
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Thank you, Mihran.
A lovely New Year’s wish…very kind of you to spread joy.
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wow! i like your poem !…
🙂
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Thank you 🙂
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welcome
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welcome!
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I like the poem… But, why suppress?
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Thank you, Rajiv. ….good question. Mostly, because I am fearful of the journey it will allow.
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